If you are a parent,  you have probably experienced those situations where your children have embarrassed you by what they say.  I have had many long years of embarrassment, including the following  3 examples:

When Steven was 4 years old, I went with him to a local facility which housed infants and toddlers who were HIV positive to pick up a new foster child.  It was a non-descript looking house which fit in well with the neighborhood.  When we walked in the front door into the large living room, the room was full of beautiful children, all playing with toys, reading a book with a staff member, or toddling over to say hello to us.  Steven, who is quite unused to group situations, took one look at the crowd and said out loud, “Holy Sh_t!  Look at all dem dere brown babies!!!!”  He was right as all of the children were minorities. (This is not to give the impression that minority children would be most at risk for AIDS, it is just that minority children are more difficult to place in foster homes.) The staff all politely laughed at his remark, especially because he did not take into account that he himself was “brown”.  (Which begs the question…if a bi-racial child is raised by Caucasian parents, doesn’t he look in the MIRROR?)

On another occasion, I took Francis to the zoo when he was about 5.  Francis is severely visually impaired and cannot see clearly beyond a few feet, although he can see fuzzy details.  While walking in the zoo, a mom and a dad were strolling along with a child in their stroller.  He was wearing a brown snowsuit, and he had a huge, full head of brown curly hair.  As we passed by them, Francis said “MOM!  MOM!  They’ve stolen one of the animals from the zoo!!!”  The parents looked aghast at his remark, and I remember making some comment about him not seeing well as I ushered Francis quickly away!

The most recent incident happened when Marie was 10.  She is profoundly deaf and normally a very compassionate young lady.  However, we saw a gentleman at the mall who was without legs and an arm.  She stared and pointed excitedly and in her innocence asked me what happened to him.  I gave her my spiel that it is not nice to point and stare because it hurts the person’s feelings.  That God makes all kinds of people and a lot of people have disabilities, just like she is deaf.  I told her the best thing to do was just be friendly, smile, and say hello, not stare.  We were signing all of this in American Sign  frenetically back and forth. We looked up from our signing to smile at the gentleman, only to find him and his friend pointing and staring at US!  We both smiled at him, and then rapidly walked off in the other direction!


Comments on: "Look at All Dem Dere Brown Babies!!!" (32)

  1. Bless you. After reading a couple of your posts I can see you are an exceptional mom, and I totally understand why blogging would be a headache reliever for you. You use humor well, Lindsey.

    The reason blogging is a headache for me (although I must say I love my blogger friends and enjoy their comments a bunch), is that I’m retired and a writer. Every time I take on one more commitment, I take time away from my two first loves, reading and writing. I’ve toyed with the idea of cutting back to maybe three posts a week. It might improve my content as well. 🙂

  2. Hi there! Thanks for coming by my little blog and leaving a comment! Feel free to use the Maxine cartoon…I found it on a joke site that said all content was free to post on other sites.

    I am also raising an adopted foster daughter (who is FAS) and can fully appreciate all the ups and downs you experience. Of course, you are experiencing it x 5! 🙂

  3. I can certainly see why people in your life say you should write a book!!! Great stories, and I have to admit my kids have put me in those embarassing situations on more than one occasion too!!! What can ya do really, but laugh? 🙂

  4. Linda in New Mexico said:

    Thanks for stopping by and leaving me a comment on my dog tales on tails.

    I am so glad you came by…I don’t believe in accidents and we have something in common. My grandson who just recently came to live with us has autism. Attends a d level kindergarten and his class is 6 little differnetly abled young boys. We have so many “funny” stories like yours. Living the life you must live kinda peels away some of the onion layers, at least for us it has and has taught us to be so much more calm and accepting of so many things that a few short months ago would have made me run into the night screaming.

    RyLeigh came 7 months ago from South Carolina where he was the only non child of color in his preschool. After the first day of school here, he reported that he was very sad because there were no “real brown cousins in his class, just light brown. He had called all the kids in his former school cousins and when we see ethnic children when we are out he will shout, Hi cousin, how r u? Sometimes the adults are…….well adults.

    I am looking forward to following you and your live adventures. How cool is this. Oma Linda

  5. Kids same the darndest things don’t they?? I love all these little stories but especially the zoo one! Thanks for sharing them and leaving me smiling! 🙂


  6. So cute! As a child I emparassed my mom and grandma many times. Once I was asked the most classical quaetion you can ask to a child: What do you want to be when you are a grown up? My answer plain and simple: To be always pregnant! (Please note that I was five, and had my own personal theory that babies will autogenerate in a woman’s womb and then they came out from the bellybutton)

  7. Oh, goodness! I can so relate!! My adopted African American son’s nickname is Zippy. Once when we were at a large gathering, the TV was showing a long advertisement / commercial / fundraiser for an orphanage in Africa. All of the babies were black. Zippy was amazed at what he saw and exclaimed, “Wow! Look at all those baby Zippies!!!” It was just a reminder to me that I have got to get him around more black families!!!


  8. That last one cracked me up! We’re all human after all, aren’t we? Your kids sound adorable. 🙂

  9. Kids certainly keep our lives interesting and we have participated in similar embarrasing conversations with our little ones.

  10. This is a wonderful mother’s story (actually stories) and I bet it is full of love in your family. My father was blind with 2% vision. My mother worked at a school for the deaf and two foster boys lived with her that were deaf. My hubby worked at a addiction program for deaf people. We all have our own areas of disability and are surrounded by others with different ones. And we are all connected. I like the way you bring out the things children say in their innocent ways that adults feel are inappropriate.

  11. funy stuff. my boys are a riot some of the things that come out of their mouths…

    as far as my post…there are a success stories…many of which would seem small to most…an MR kids holding down a job when no one thought he could, a kid going from juvie to home and thriving, a kid getting himself up and dressed in time for the school bus for the first time ever…i collect those as well. they keep me sane and keep me going back. they give me smiles and tears and i love em to death.

  12. You are a treasure. I can’t wait to read more wonderful, humorous stories about your mothering!

  13. That is so funny about Steven! We can learn a lot from our children. :o)

  14. Hello there,
    Oh my Gosh, and I thought I had difficulties. Thank you so much for stopping by my blog. So glad to “meet” you.

  15. Yike! What goes around comes around? 🙂

  16. Recently my children have commented about a “fat” man and a little boy with a “brown face.” I was a bit embarrassed about both incidents but tried to realize they are simply preschoolers who find everything fascinating. I did explain that it’s not polite to point these types of things out loud though in the hope it won’t happen again.

    I love the story about you and your daughter signing about the man while he was pointing at you both thinking your signing was interesting. I thought that was cute.

  17. Goodness! I do know about those little moments of embarrassment. Perhaps too well…

    May you be blessed! And thanks for visiting my blog today. 🙂

  18. I struggle with trying to teach my daughter the finer points of being a nice and not pointing out people’s flaws. Finding differences seems to be one of the developmental milestones of childhood though and most recently found her spoiling to point out to me that the woman next to us in JoAnn Fabrics was OLD. I tried feebly to explain to her in the car that OLD is one that she should never say out loud especially when she’s right!

    So nice that you can find humor in these experiences!

  19. Hilarious! Thanks for the smile!

  20. You have some wonderful stories and an interesting life. I love your positive outlook. 🙂

  21. oh my goodness… I am laughing so…

    what a great inspiration you are

    this was exactly what I needed to start my morning! Thanks!

  22. I nominated you for a beautiful blogger award on my site

  23. upsidebackwards said:

    The story about Francis made me laugh out loud!
    I think the worst moment like that I’ve had is tame by comparison – my then-5yo asking loudly on the bus “Mummy, why does that lady over there have a moustache?” Not just the lady herself, but the entire bus swivelled in their seats to hear my answer…
    Thanks for stopping by my blog! Much appreciated 🙂

    • 5kidswdisabilities said:

      Oh, that’s funny! It reminded me of something Francis said when he was younger…but I’ll save it for a blog entry. Thanks for reminding me!!!!

  24. Dear Lindsey,
    I’ve spent the whole morning reading through your archives and so much of what you say about adoptive parenting absolutely resonates with me. Thank you for the Sheppard Pratt link..will follow it through. Any feedback on the Trauma center at Brookline and Mclean at Belmont? I only know what I read on their websites and would appreciate any first hand information you may have. I have family living in California and have been looking for treatmnet centers there but I have not been able to locate any. Thank you and god bless you for all the goodness you bring to the world.


    • 5kidswdisabilities said:

      Yes, McLean was recommended by my son’s psychiatrist, and Shephard-Pratt was recommended by his counselor. Treatment by Dr. Joy Silberg would be the key. She is at Shephard-Pratt, but if she is unavailable to provide treatment, I wouldn’t be in a position to recommend them.

  25. What a wonderful introduction to your blog! It’s nice to be here and I love your writing. I will be back again very soon.

    Hope your weekend is fun.


  26. Brutal honesty is a wonderful thing about children. Love your stories.
    Thanks for sharing.

    Heather at http://heatheronawire.wordpress.com

  27. writesforallmommies said:

    I completely understand that blogging your way through parenting can be a lifesaver. I also relate to having children with vision issues and some of the things they ‘think’ they see end up being quite embarrassing when spoken out loud. Keep blogging and always look for the humor. It shows itself in the most unexpected places as you know!

  28. No kidding! Sometimes what we say comes back to bite us, too. Our 8 year old has done a lot of hard work to change his behavior, so whenever we see a kid acting out (doing something he used to do), I whispered, “I’m so glad you don’t act like that anymore. I’m so proud of all your hard work!” One day, we were at a pizza place and another child was throwing a grand mal fit and a half. The parents were at the table next to ours (not intervening). Our boy pointed at the child and said, loud enough for the whole restaurant to hear, “MAMA, AREN’T YOU SO GLAD I DON’T ACT LIKE THAT? ARE YOU PROUD AT ME?”
    Yes, son. Yes, I am.

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